SUCKS

People always say that it is not easy to engage in a long distance relationship. It has to endure the test of time, and distance. But I try to work it out. Lots of sacrifices made. I have to face the entire journey from kerteh back to KL every single weekend just to make up all the weekdays that I missed spending with the person that I love. 4 hours journey x 2 x 4weeks in a month x 52 weeks in a month. You do the math. To top this is the money that I spend while driving back/ car pooling. Money spent on phone bills just to make sure that he is not lonely, and just to make sure that we are kept updated about what is happening to each other. Sure there are always cheaper alternatives to resort to. Like the convenience of e-mail. But all I get from e-mail is how are you? Have you taken your b’fast? What are you having for lunch? I love you, and I miss you. I need more! I need to know what is happening to him. Like all the job interviews he is attending, the friend that he is having a disagreement with, planning that he is making for his future, the projects that he is currently doing in the office, the new phone he is planning on buying, year end bonus that he got (not that I’m going to talk him into buying me new things). I’m really depressed =( I’m having a second thought. Is it him? Or is it just me. He is not comfortable with sharing all this intimate information with me. I’m sick of reading all the books on relationship just to make sure that this relationship will work out. It just doesn’t. Given the distance between him and me, all that is left for us is communication and sharing. But I’m not getting any of it.

I went to work for about 2 hours. I’m not feeling well. Soar throat, runny nose, and fever. Went to see the doctor and I got Medical Leave. Stayed at home the whole day. I don’t have anything in the cabinet that can be cooked easily and fast. So I just had 2 slices of bread and jem.

I went for tennis practice in the evening. In fact, it is a qualifying match for the coming Sports Carnival. My performance sucks! The girl that is playing against me was really good. I’m disappointed in myself. I’m sucks.

Finished my match at 7.30. Got home and found out that my toe is bleeding. It hurts. I can barely stand properly. Let alone perform my prayer properly. I’m having difficulties to sleep. It sucks!