CRAP

Im having 4 days course in PERMATA and today is the 3rd day. My boss must be really mad at me since I've been spending more then half of this month im away from the office for outstation.

I had a strange feeling this morning and it was very disturbing. I hardly eat and let alone sleep. I loose focus in the training room, and I just did not have the mood :( I feel like going back to my mom's place and play with nene hoping dat his kisses will ease this feeling. I feel so stupid and childish to drag myself into this feeling, but I just can't help it. Im going to ask sue out tonite, maybe bangsar or even hartamas. Anywhere that can help me forget/stop this feeling. I feel JEALOUS!!!! crap!! maybe Im just playing stupid.

Bakti

My organization is introducing a new program called "Program Bakti Pendidikan P*******". This is in line with our company's Brand Essence which spell, "the energy we receive, is the energy we return, aspiring people everywhere". For this program a few executives will be selected to teach english and math in selected schools throughout Malaysia. In my case, I was selected to be the teacher in a school in Penang. Im all excited and looking forward to meet this children.

MB is sent me to KLIA that morning. All of the facilitators are required to wear the program's official T'shirt which i find very hidious since the color is a combination of stricking green and stricking orange! can you actually imagine dat? the person who design the layout of the t'shirt must be retarded or something. We dun have any other option though.

Upon reaching Penang International Airport, a coaster is waiting to transport us to the school. It took us approximately an hour to reach the schol. Our arrival was greeted with hundreds of school children, parents and teachers. There were kompang, bunga manggar, and silat in the openning ceremony which I found very impressive. The "PIBG" association of the school was very excited and appreciative of the effort that we are putting (expertise & financially) to help the school improve its overall performance.

Alas, the program ends at 1 pm. Tiring as we are, we were all very motivated and inspired to contribute our best back to the nation (chewah!). We left penang on the 3.10pm flight back to KL.

That evening, I had dinner with MB at hartamas square and also to watch the big match between Liverpool & MU. The place was crowded. We had a very delicious salmon pasta, ice-cream waffle and otak2. The game was great (Liverpool won and MB was happy), and the night was wonderful... gosh... being able to spend time with MB will always be wonderful :)

TGI ... thrusday :)

Its Thursday again... Every living (and especially working) creature in this west cost area of Malaysia is looking forward for this day, just like everyone else in other part of Malaysia is looking forward for Friday. And yes, the level of my mood is almost reaching the floor. I cant concentrate on anything else since my mind are fully occupied on the thought of going back toKL this evening and also... MB definitely (Im missing you like mad).MB is leaving for JB this afternoon with NH on business. And his coming back on Friday night and guess what? Im leaving for penang on early Saturday morning. My flight is at 7.15 in the morning, which means, I will only have merely a few hours to see him... Crap!

Im having a terible period pain this morning. I went around the office building in search for pain-killer. I looked in all the first-aid boxes located at every department and asked all the female staff but to no avail. I almost fainted when I reach the first floor and witnessed by one of my colleague, Ng (errrr.. It is not as bad as it sounds really). He took me to the clinic and the doctor gave me some pain killer and told me that my blood level was really low and ask me to eat more red-meat. Hell no! I hate red-meat. Let alone eating them... He said drinking milo will do. So I will have beef burger and iced-milo for my lunch today. (red-meat from Mc'Donalds are an exceptional..hehehe).I watched a movie last night before going to bed. Its a movie called "Provac Nation" staring Cristina Ricci. It was a fast paced movie about Lizzie, a brilliant but troubled harvard journalism student. She got an award while in the uni, but at the same time she has a conflict with her attitude, family and love life. She abused her self with drug and alcohol and also... sex! Its basedon true story... Malas nak tulis panjang, so if you guys happen to drop by at any of the DVD shop, please find it okey :) chiow

its 7th FeBruaRY

Today is MB birthday. Im regret dat I can't be with him on his special day.However, I manage to finally find him gift.. Or gifts to be precise. Hope you like it dear!

Valentine day or St. Valentine's Day is approaching. Everybody, regardless age, gender, religion and nationality are eager for the day to come where they will actually take the opportunity to express their endless love to their love ones. Muslims are not supposed to celebrate this day and as a Muslim, I choose not to elaborate further on this as it is too sensitive. We'll, I had a chat with mazran today about valentine. He is in the midst of finding gift for the love of his life (his girlfriend la...) and was asking for my opinion as a girl. Hehehe... I didn't actually give him any solution in the end ;-) sorry ran.

Mazran ... akum
Mazran ... weih
Mazran ... ada tak tuh
Mazran ... ?
Me... w'salam
Me... ada nape?
Mazran... weih liza nak tanyer something
Me... apa dia mazran
Me... tyanye la
Mazran ... eh....untuk valentime nanti..... apa ko suggest aku kasi kat sarah yek
Me... hehe... jap aku fikir
Me... aku tgh sign overtime staff
Mazran... ko pikir dulu
Mazran.. sat lagi bagi tau aku... nak jumper bos aku sat
Mazran ... back to our discussion...
Me... yes Im back
Me... kalau aku kan... masa valentine aku suka kalau dapt chocolate
Me... crap... sume pompuan suka dapat choc
Me... so ko bagi la choc.. dgn teddy bear
Me... takyah beli rosses , masa valentine mahal arr
Me... kalau ko nak beli gak bunga, beli kat petaling street
Me... cantik and murah
Mazran ... tapi aku dah bagi bunga kat dia....choc kat dia... perfume kat dia
Mazran ... hehe... bunga baru hari tuh bagi...
Me... takpun ko bawak dia gi dinner ar, kan dorang byk buat valentine dinner
Mazran... cam maner nak bawak gi dinner... kiter keja daa
Mazran... unless laa aku keje kat KL
Me... Hehe... jgn marah
Mazran... aku ingat nak kasi bunga kat dia....i mean org antar kat office...
Mazran ... tapi aku takut drastic sangat move tuh
Mazran ... dia hari tuh suka gila sebab first time dapat bunga...
Me... Ye... dia ada cita kat aku
Me... sgt excited minah tu :)
Mazran... hehe... aku malas nak kasi bunga sebab nanti apa pulak org cakap kan...
Me... susah gak kan.. tapi who cares... Dia gf ko
Mazran ... i know.... memang dia gf aku... tapi ko tahu ahh kan....dia pun tak bagi tau semua
org lain saper aku etc... so aku tak nak timbulkan gossip pulak nanti...
Mazran... telinga aku pun dah cukup panas ahh dengar rumors...
Me... Ceh.. dah ada rumors ke?
Me... aku takde dgr pun.. ala.. tutup telinga jer... org lain jeles
Mazran ... bukan masalah jeles... tapi masalah org salah anggap...
Mazran ... aku dengar banyak citer pasal aku tinggal X aku sebab aku jumper anak TanSri..
Mazran ... ada yg cakap sarah nie rampas aku laa... tension ahh jugak aku dengar bende2 nie
Me... buat tak tau jer la mazran.. dah couple dgn anak tan sri
Me... so ko kena terima benda2 mcm nie
Me... tu sebab masa kat permata aku takmo rapat sgt dgn sarah
Me... takut dia ingat aku take advantage on her
Me... back to ur prob.. kalau ko betul nak deliver sumthing to her on valentine
Me... aku ada catalog... NOEL gift... mcm2 lagi
Me... aku suke sume barang2 dia, ada flower basket, choc pun ada.. teddy bear pun ada
Mazran... aku sayang kat sarah... n also a symbol of my love ahh....so price don't matter
Mazran... try to make her as happy as she can be
Mazran... but it really hurt laa....first time aku long distance relationship
Mazran... tapi tu ahh...masalah jugak sebab aku suka bagi hadiah out of the blue...
Mazran... sekarang dah tak tahu nak kasi apa... wahahaha
Me... semlm aku gi mid valley, dorang dah start jual hadiah valentine
Me... mcm2 and cantik gile, tak pe..Me... u'll figure out later anyway

Love song

1st February 2006

I was riding in my friends car when I first lay my ears on this masterpiece. It was actually an old song, remade by a group called 311. The lyric and melody is beautiful, and I made my friend play back the song over and over again until everybody in the car got sick :) somehow the lyric reminds me of someone, and if that someone is reading this particularentry, "baby, this song is for you!

"Whenever I'm alone with you
You make me feel like I am home again
Whenever I'm alone with you
You make me feel like I am whole again
Whenever I'm alone with you
You make me feel like I am young again
Whenever I'm alone with you
You make me feel like I am fun again

However far away, I will always love you
However long I stay, I will always love you
Whatever words I say, I will always love you
I will always love you

Whenever I'm alone with you
You make me feel like I am free again
Whenever I'm alone with you
You make me feel like I am clean again

However far away, I will always love you
However long I stay, I will always love you
Whatever words I say, I will always love you
I will always love you

Geisha

28th January 2006

Im in the office rite now.. waiting for the second meeting to begin(8:00pm)... Today alone, I have 3 meetings in a row beginning from this morning!anyway, during my dept meeting this afternoon, my manager voice out that she was thinking of moving me to Kuantan branch and ask me what do I think of that idea. I said that I dun have any problem with it, afterall it is nearer to KL :) But my immediate superrior is againts the idea :( he said that Im still new and that I have lots of things to learn in Kerteh....jahat la dia....2morow is thurday, and Im not excited about it since Im not going back toKL.... and I have to wait for another few days before I can actually see MB :( My friend and I was talking about Geisha... She read the book and said it was way better then the movie (she already watched the movie on the DVD). ada byk part yang takde... So I was thinking of getting the book this weekend at Kuantan, and later watch the movie at cinema. And u really have to watch it at the cinema because it is the quality that matters and u are not suppose to support the pirate industry and like the radio says....PIRACY SUCKS!!! (hahaha.... Im speaking to myself too) and she said the movie was so good, that she cried at the end of the movie.... I really,really, really want to watch it!!! Orait, Its already 8:00pm. I got to attend the third and final meetingbefore I can actually go back and have a nice shower before re-chargingmyself in the slumber.

CNY

Chinese new year is just around the corner. Im sure that every living creature on this planet who work their ass off from 8-6 every day or thoose who is on shift and especially those who work as employee (like me) are looking forward for the long holiday that is coming next week. My motivation is zero. All I can think of is to pack my bag and head back toKL and to live as a human again!Anyway, me, sarah & mazran is planning on a vacation to penang this holiday. Yeehaa! I called my sis in penang to book us an appartment. Im sure dat all of us is going to have lots of fun in penang. Afterall, its has been months since the last time I went back to the place where I was born.Mt life is going on as usual. Revolves around work and travelling back to KL. My love life??? Hahaha... I get a goose bumps everytime I came to thinkof it :) but in a good way if u must know.... But only God knows the ending. And like they say, happy endings are only on the silver screen...

Wishing On the Star!

(26th December 2005)

Its been a though week for me. I have loads and loads of work which is urgent considering the dead lines, and at the same time, I've been missing someone so much that I dun actually give 100% focus on my work.Ita just got back from Australia. She gave me two cute Koala Bear and apink T'shirt :) Tq mate! This week I will be travelling back from KL to kerteh with Ita and syahril. We decided to make a move at 10pm since syahril promised to be the driver (me and ita hate to drive at night).Any how, syahril turn out to be sleepy that night and he made ita drive from Ampang Point to Karak while he gets some sleep and exchange the seat with ita later. I try to make some conversation with ita since she herself is sleepy because of lack of sleep in the plane (she just arrived M'sia at 7am that morning). Upon reaching Karak, I can see both Ita and syahril are in no position to drive. Ita ask if Im "fit" to drive the car up to Temerloh.So it is my turn to drive her vios. Wow! This car is really cool!!! It is nowhere compared to my Gen-2.. Hehehe. Surprisingly, Im not sleepy at all that night, most probably because of the Coffee Bean's Ice Blended that I had earlier with MB that night. As u can guess, I drove up to kerteh. Im impressed with myself :) driving up to 170 km/h, we reached kerteh at 1.30am.... Thats a 3 hour journey from karak to kerteh..hahaha.. My mom will go mad if she finds out the speed that Im driving... Heck! She'll be mad even if I drive at 120 km/h!

HSE manager called me while I was driving saying that there is an emergency at the Plant. The management had declared a Tier-2 emergency, and me as asupport staff is required to be at the office... Great!I rushed to the office once I reached kerteh. There was a minor fire at oneof our plant. No injuries or fatalities (Alhamdulillah). After helping the SGM with report writing (the system is down so we have to write the report manually, and it so happens that they figure out that my hand writing isthe most acceptable among all in the meeting room). Later that night, my housemate and I (the 8 of us) went for dinner near "muara". The food was nice and we had the best conversation ever. We went there in two car. Me and sharn is driving . After dinner we decided to hang out at awana kijal's beach. It was nice listening to the live band playing mariah carey's song whilst us girls chatting and eating ice-cream...lalalala...

While me and ita embracing ourself in the sea breeze, I saw a shoting star!!! I jump up and down all excited to see the star for the first time in my entire life. Quickly and secretly I made a wish.... A wish that only The All Mighty, the sea, the stars and me know what it is....